I can’t remember
Where I found you,
Why I brought you,
To my heart.
Where’s my hat?
Where’s my dreams?
Did I feed my cat?
Am I full of sins?
I can’t remember,
Why you left me,
Why I loved you,
So much?
I’ve lost my soul.
Where’s my key?
Can I live without hope?
Yes! I Can!!!
I hope…
I hope…
Então tu também escreves em inglés, o que significa que a tua expressão e teu lirismo romântico ultrapassa a barreira da língua, e o que são fronteiras para poesia? Muito bom,
ReplyDeleteum cordial abraço poeta.
I liked this poem - it has a simple vocabulary, it's light and at the same time it puts the reader into a relfexitive mood. The poem seems very subjetive but yet we can identify that you're clealy talking about love deceptions and deceptions with life in general. I specifically liked the last four line where you show your uncertainty before Life's own uncertainties by affirming that you can be hopeful but you doubt it at the same time. However, the only thing that I thought was a weak point in the poem were the two lines that rhymed "cat" with "hat". These words are so well known (with Dr. Suss's 'The Cat in the Hat') that it almost becomes cliché to put them rhyming in a poem...to me at least it does. But all in all, I like this one. Good job.
ReplyDelete--- Davi Coêlho.
Ola Amigos,
ReplyDeleteMuito obrigado pelos comentarios.
Com certeza eles me ajudarao a melhorar minha maneira de escrever.
Grande abraco!
Joao